My college linguistics professor—well, maybe he wasn’t a professor, but he was a doctor, at least—often used the acronym “WIGO,” or “What Is Going On.” And if you have been reading my blog for a very long time, you’ll know that I already have a post entitled “WIGO,” back from 2010 in which I discuss tummyaches, pumpkins, ponies, and novelist Jodi Picoult. This time, WIGO is a very different mish-mash of happenings. They include, but are not limited to, the following:
1. My dad got engaged last Friday, on a boat—the Delta Queen, or something Mark Twainy like that—floating down the Sacramento River. Kaye said yes. The ring is now on the finger. The wedding date is set for Aug. 4, or maybe Aug. 11 if things go terribly awry.
2. My mother remains completely dead.
3. Due to the ongoing fact of No. 2, I had my first Mother’s Day without her. It wasn’t so bad. Simon and Annika took me to have a real English cream tea at Meadowlark Tea Room, which is owned by a charming woman with an even more charming East London accent. It’s amazing that one can find this in Vancouver, Washington, but one can. And boy howdy, does she make a mean cucumber sandwich.
4. Two days AFTER Mother’s Day, though, I was so sad I couldn’t get out of bed. Again.
5. I got fed up with being fat and feel something akin to determination with regard to losing weight.
6. I went to a cooking class and learned how to make paella, although I can guarantee you I will never, ever, ever make it at home, because it’s got mussels and shrimp and stuff and I just can’t get into the whole shellfish thing. They just taste mildly garbagey to me.
7. Kaye was showing her house to a real estate agent in preparation for selling it. (She’ll eventually move in with Dad, but Dad lives so far out in the country that it’s really not feasible for her to live there full-time. Dad may eventually sell his house, but in the meantime they’ll probably get a condo or townhouse somewhere in Vancouver or Northeast Portland, closer to all the kids.) Anyhow, during the house tour, as she was descending the ladder into her small basement, she slipped and fell, fracturing her spine and her hand. She’s been in the hospital for three days and is feeling better, but the fractures will take eight to twelve weeks to heal. She hopes she’ll be better by Aug. 4. Or Aug. 11, as the case may be. At any rate, it’s been kind of sucky for Dad to be in the hospital. Again. But probably not as sucky as actually having a spinal fracture.
8. Did I mention it’s hard to get out of bed? I’m TIRED. Why I am so tired?
9. In spite of this niggling tiredness, my new friend Carrie and I have decided to participate in a local vintage/handmade goods flea market on July 14. Beyond that, we are tentatively planning to open a space in the local antique store, which is incredibly well-trafficked and full of wonderful finds. We’re calling our new business Gables, and here is the logo that I designed:
10. So far we have made wreaths covered with dictionary-page flowers, sailboats made out of ticking-stripe cloth and driftwood, glass magnets, and several soldered silver necklaces. It’s all, you know, stuff you’d find in shabby chic/upcycled/vintage-type stores. I’ll add a mix of some knick-knacks I’ve got hanging about in boxes, an excess of my grandmother’s linens, tiny terrariums in old vases, and lots of handmade stuff like framed silhouettes on burlap. The kind of stuff that would only interest you if you’ve got an interest in crafty things, which I do. And at this point, I’ve got nothing to lose, so I might as well have a bit of fun.
Do those two gables—which are not really gables but actually dormers—make you think of boobies? Because they make ME think of boobies. I don’t know why. They’re not round and squishy. But they do have pointy bits. Is it because there are two of them? At any rate, boobies can’t be bad for business.